Happy Mother's Day!

Early this afternoon I opened my e-mail to find the following letter from my mom. I've been having a bit of a trying week, with Maddux going through an out-of-character fussy phase. He's been cutting some teeth and the poor little guy has just been beside himself and I've been left feeling like I am doing something wrong because I can't seem to soothe him like usual.

So when I read these words from my own mother, I burst into tears, I think because it really helped me put this week into perspective. This time in my life is such a tiny sliver and will be gone in the blink of an eye. I want to savor every second, even the fussy ones and hold tight to these still forming memories. One day my little man will be a grown up with his own life and his own family, and these sleepless nights will be far in the distance. 

So thanks Mom for helping me remember that there is a season for all things. And now, here is her letter, shared with her permission.

before you were a mom

before you were a mom, you were my little girl.

you were a princess that i dressed in frilly dresses

until you became old enough to object

because you wanted to climb trees and play in the dirt with your brothers.

we would have tea parties and eat pretend food

and you would take care of your baby dolls 

the way you take care of munchie today.

well, hopefully, you take better care of munchie

because you did leave tooth prints on the cheek of one baby.

before you were a mom, you were my little ballerina.

you would dress in homemade costumes and

you would twirl and twirl

with your hands over your head

and pretend that your were on stage.

then you took lessons and practiced

and finally you were wearing a real costume 

and dancing on a real stage.

i began to see the graceful and poised woman 

that you would become.

before you were a mom, you were my little wonder woman.

you would insist on wearing your red, white, and blue costume for days at a time

and declare, "i'm wonder woman" to anyone and everyone 

and i guess you knew what you were talking about

because everyone who knows you today would agree

that you really are a wonder woman.

before you were a mom, you were a teenager.

when i hear stories of moms and their teenage daughters

who hate each other, or act like it anyway, i'm amazed

because you were an almost perfect teenage daughter.

i guess that's because you had gotten everything out of your system

in kindergarten.

before you were a mom, you were a country rock star

who turned me into a stage mom

who made complete strangers listen to your karaoke tapes 

and caused me to stalk and accost unsuspecting celebrities

and entertainment execs in the hopes that they would discover

the great talent that i had discovered when you were twelve years old.

i always believed that you would see your dreams come true

and i still do.

before you were a mom, you were a businesswoman.

when you finally embraced my thrift shop obsession,

you used that knowledge to create a lovely boutique.

and i was so proud.

you even trusted me to take care of the money

knowing that i might end up giving a customer

twenty dollars in change for a ten dollar purchase. 

before you were a mom, you were my daughter,

and my friend.

i like to think that i've taught you some things about life,

but i also know that you've taught me some things, as well.

i've watched you grow into a beautiful, intelligent, and compassionate woman who can handle adversity and heartache

with strength and courage, far beyond your years.

I’ve admired your independence and your ability to drive in new york 

and l.a. traffic.

you've borne witness of your faith in Christ with the way you've

lived your life and the way you've treated 

your family, your friends, and everyone you meet,

except for those terrible nashville drivers.

but nobody's perfect.

and now you are a mom yourself

with a precious baby boy.

you will watch him be superman

and pray that he won't break something

when he tries to fly off the top of his dresser.

you’ll cheer him on when he plays baseball,

or football. or basketball. or soccer.

you'll give him cookies and milk when he comes home from school

and help him with his homework.

and believe that he is the smartest kid in the world

and make plans for him to go to harvard.

you'll take him camping and on hikes

and maybe even climb a mountain with him one day.

you'll go for walks on the beach and collect shells

and tell him how much his nana loves the beach, and him.

you’ll sing him the same lullaby that i sang to you,

except you’ll be in tune and he’ll actually go to sleep

instead of crying.

you’ll laugh and cry and and pray and worry about him

even when he’s thirty years old and has a child of his own.

you’ll teach him about God and what it means to have Christ as his Savior,

the most important lesson of all.

and someday you might have another little boy or girl

and start the whole thing over again.

and if you follow in my footsteps, it’ll be again, and again,

and again, and again, and again, and again, and again.

or maybe not.

i thank God every day that I am your mom

and someday munchie will thank God that you are his mom.

I love you

happy 1^st mother’s day